All Conditioned Things: On Memories, Mortality, and Making Records

Thoughts prompted by a new camcorder

Our memories are fallible. We regret the gradual loss of life’s treasured details, even if we have the wisdom to see that nudging towards the present rather than the past as a kind of unburdening.

Upon returning from my collegiate coast-to-coast Kerouacian cross-country car trip from Washington, D.C. to Berkeley, California, I could recite to anyone who didn’t stop me what states and sites we saw on each day of our adventure. This was true, but with less detail, a year after our trip. And then two years after our trip – and mind you, I was still a nimble-brained undergraduate at the time – I realized that I was forgetting key elements of our trip, so I recorded each stage of our odyssey in a hardback journal.

I have forgotten what happened to that journal.

Doing some work in my campus office in January, I came across a notebook where I kept all my notes from an undergraduate anthropology class. The class notebook was also filled with genial messages passed back and forth with a classmate. As the end of the spring semester was approaching, I asked her for her address so I could send her a postcard over the summer, so she wrote her name and address. With her first and last name recorded, my 2025 self could look her up.

The obituary revealed that she had passed away from cancer about five years ago—decades sooner than anyone might have expected. She was survived by her parents, her husband, and two children. I thought about writing a note of condolence to her husband, but I realized how little I remembered about his wife. Aside from the casual affection in our notes, I can’t recall much—not even whether I sent that promised postcard.

After my mom passed away this past September, my wife Kate put together a beautiful short film made up of “live” photos (Apple’s term for three-second snippets of video) that she had taken of one of our previous visits with mom. You could see mom smiling and laughing with her grandkids, offering evidence of her love and humor. I miss such moments with my mom, so I treasure the snippets of video.

My late father was the most filmed person I knew personally. As a film and theatre critic on Washington, D.C.’s CBS affiliate, he appeared on television just before Walter Cronkite—so often that my friends and strangers alike recognized him on the street. Nearly 38 years after his last broadcast, we have almost no surviving footage. In the 1990s, when those televisedappearances were still fresh in our memories, we didn’t notice the loss. Now, I wish I could show my kids their “Grand-Davey” in his prime.

We have posted many digital memories online. Though I don’t get on Facebook to post so much these days, I am touched by the long-ago pictures and video of our kids that I encounter there sometimes.

Determined to preserve new memories—especially with summer adventures ahead—today I bought myself a DJI Osmo Pocket 3. This compact camcorder, with a built-in gimbal and self-facing camera, is popular with vloggers for its smooth footage and portability.

The Buddha teaches us that “All conditioned things are impermanent,” and who could argue. That said, I have some capturing and, eventually, some sharing to do. We will see how the output of my new toy will inform my fleeting future memories, or those others who might also seek to remember.

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Speaking of memories, this week’s newsletter is dedicated to the memory of Bill Roe, an unparalleled champion of Davis civic life and the arts in Davis, and a friend to many, including myself. May his memory be a blessing to all who knew him.

For more Pub Quiz fun, please subscribe via Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/c/yourquizmaster.

Best,

Dr. Andy

P.S. Three questions from last week:

1. Mottos and Slogans. What used clothing and gifts store calls itself “The Happiest Store in Davis”?

2. Internet Culture. Both the most and second-most popular AI apps start with the letter C. Chat GPT is the first. What is the second? Hint: It’s not Copilot or Claude.

3. Newspaper Headlines. The number of U.S. measles cases recently topped 700, with more than 540 of those cases in what U.S. state?

P.P.S. Our next Poetry Night on May 1 will feature Oswaldo Vargas and Patrick Grizzell, President of the Sacramento Poetry Center! Plan to join us at the Natsoulas Gallery!